Saturday, October 9, 2010

Finally...a word on my experience in New York

I have prayed over speaking about my whole experience in New York. All I can say is that New York was a life changing experience for me. I learned so much...and not in any way that I expected to. I came back home soaked in disappointment. Close to tears every time someone even asked me about the trip. The specifics of the negative aspects are not necessary. Now that I have had time, prayer and clear thoughts to reflect on the full of the experience. It has changed my life in so many remarkable, wonderful, and fabulous ways!! God showed up in my life! Protected me like a father! Blessed me with opportunity! Showed me the true value of my life and everyone in it! I went to New York with intentions of going to the next level in my career... I had no idea that it was truly to reach the next level spiritually.
I left Charlotte with my nose in the air, unappreciative and spoiled with what it had to offer. I just knew that I had reached my limit here... I was above this silly, country, city.  The same place that offered undying support from loved ones... the same place that sowed seeds into my journey...the same place that had provided me every opportunity until then...
To arrive in New York City, a foreign place, where people barely new my name... And certainly didn't know who  I was...and more importantly, could care less. Unfamiliar territory...subways, and buses, and walking for blocks. People with hardened faces, cold spirits and bags that weighed them down. Literally and figuratively. Everybody hustlin! Just tryna make the next level...a rat race. In a huge city...with huge rats! lol! Not even the pigeons there care to say excuse me, getting all up in your personal space! I had to adapt, to a cold stare, as not to show emotion or thought...not as if anyone would have cared...but not to appear weak or "country". All this to a woman who is used to strangers who say good morning! To cars that stop in the street and let you pass by as they wave. To people who know its customary and "good manners" to say please and thank you. Now I'm not saying that there were not nice people there, because there most certainly were! But the city, as a whole, was not... nice. Just so happened the woman I connected with the most, was from North Carolina! lol. I never realized how long 9 days were...until then. To be away from home...from true love. 9 days to never home. Can you imagine that half the people there are not at home...majority are not even American.
I came back to my city. To my loved the ones that love me. Truly. As I walked into MY Apartment,  just to gaze on what was friend Johnatha had put up balloons and streamers and flowers. I collapsed to the floor in tears. They were tears of joy, of frustration, of release, of thanks. That I had that! I had real friends, I had real love, I had a home. I think somewhere in the experience of New York, I almost forgot what it felt like...God reminded me. What I have here is so much greater, than anybody's idea of what success is. My appreciation is renewed and restored. God is simple, we make life hard...I am thankful...and that makes the experience more rewarding than anything a person could ever give me.


  1. Wow... to know that He loves us so much to give us what we need is amazing. When we have one plan, He has another. I'm thankful that you are in a place to know and accept what God has for you. Thank you for sharing this.

  2. Thank you for sharing your experience. So many of us dream of going to a big city to 'make it'. My heart was so set on Chicago...but I hate cold weather. How great it is that God showed you that you can 'make it' where ever you are when He is with you.